Rules are not different for men or women - unless you let them be.

Rules are not different for men or women - unless you let them be.

photo credit: zieak

In 1985 I was a speaker at the Young President’s Organization leadership conference in Mexico City. The organizer became my event mentor.

Afterwards I learned from him that my audience rating ranked higher then the male speakers. Heartened, I discussed my business future with him. He said, “You’ll have a successful speaking and coaching career but as a woman you’ll never get the fee a man can - even if you’re better.”

At that time, the U.S. government statistics showed women were being paid .70 to a man’s $1.00. (I was young and I figured that would change.) Twenty-five years later, the 2008 U.S. statistics show women earn .80 to a man’s $1.00.

So is compensation an exception, and are rules different for the sexes? No, if you don’t let it. Yes, statistically fee disparately is still out there — but not for me (and doesn’t have to be for the women in your life either).

Why? Because like another mentor told me, “If you want to get paid as much as a man, ask for more money. Don’t assume you’ll get it on merit. Ask for it like a man does.”

Carnegie Mellon University research shows:

-women ask for 30% less money than men
-women ask for raises 85% less often
-men are four times more likely to negotiate salary

If you’re a woman reading this ask for more. If you’re a man tell your wife and daughter to also.

To ask:

1.Pick a good time, like when you’ve just received public kudos for your work, headhunters are pursuing you, the company is doing well financially, the labor market is tight in your specialty, the budget for next year is about to be set, and/or your boss is in a good mood. (The current economic situation might suggest you hold off for a few months.)

2.Be able to prove your contribution to the company like having secured a significant piece of new business, improved product quality or customer service, advanced the development of a new product or service, took on more responsibility or risk, increased the visibility of the company or your team, and/or received an outstanding performance appraisal.

3.Think flexibility in getting money — or something better — like the freedom to work at home one or more days a week, the first shot at a new opportunity, professional coaching, salary review on an accelerated basis, a guaranteed bonus based on meeting a specified target, and/or an extra week of vacation.

Will you get what you ask for? Maybe, but you sure won’t if you don’t ask.